Ava is 15 years old and has just suffered a devastating loss. Her boyfriend Jackson died and the book opens with Ava at Jackson’s funeral. Her grief is all consuming and she floats through the days in a fog, sleeping with the aid of pills.
One day Ava feels a chill in the room, a coolness on the back of her neck. While in the bathroom she sees a brief flash of Jackson’s face in the mirror. Her stereo mysteriously turns itself on and plays a song. Her belongings move. And she thinks she can smell his aftershave…and hear his voice in her head.
At first, Ava is thrilled and she finds all sorts of excuses to stay home sit around, hoping that she will catch a small sign from Jackson. And they appear for her. But as time goes on, as her friends and her parents encourage her to get out more, to do things, to move on, she realises that Jackson’s presence isn’t as friendly as it could be and nor is it as welcome any longer.
In order to move on, Ava has to say goodbye to Jackson and let him move on too. There’s just one thing she has to give him to set him free to leave.
There’s not much I can say about this one. I literally read it in 25-30m. I read half of it in the car while my husband was running an errand in a store! It’s written in verse, so most of the time there’s less than 50 words on each page and it’s pretty much a skim through read that takes no time at all.
Lisa Schroeder has managed to say a lot with very little words. Ava’s grief is so beautifully told, so obvious. She’s a teenage girl in love for the first time and then that is snatched away from her and her devastation and guilt is enormous. She holes herself up in her house, worrying her parents, distancing herself from her friends. When she discovers that she feels Jackson around her, she isn’t frightened of him. She’s glad that he is around, as they promised to be together forever.
But life goes on and eventually Ava begins to rediscover herself. She starts to hang with her friends again. She meets a nice boy who likes her and who she wants to be friends with. She grows and makes the decision that it’s time to move on and let Jackson go too. She has to let go of the past, let go of the reason why she feels that terrible guilt and embrace what she has left, the life that is hers.
Teenage grief is a difficult subject as it can be hard to express the true depth of it without crossing a line into hysteria or something that just makes the reader roll their eyes or laugh but this one manages to succeed. Ava goes through a myriad of emotions about Jackson but it is also a period of personal growth for her as she learns that she can still live her life and enjoy it even though Jackson is no longer with her.
An easy book for anyone to read, even teens who don’t enjoy reading.
7/10
Book #185 of 2011
